Hello people of the world it is I, The Truthful One writing another amusing (or not you pick) blog entry, telling you all about the completely INSANE world we live, eat, sleep, and crack lame jokes in.
But anyway going back to the topic in mind, I have got a theory that I have come up with.
Birds hate my window.
It is as simple as that.
So far there has been Taylor the pigeon (that still hasn't come back, hazzah!) that sits and bangs its head against my window.
And now there is a new member of the window haters club, a blackbird that I have decided to call Greg, as it seems rude to call it, It. Anyway Greg had a much more vigorous approach to what the pigeon did.
Greg was probably thinking in his little brain that "Hey the pigeon managed to make that girl fall off her chair; I bet I could take it a step further and make her heart stop altogether."
Well ha-ha “Greg” you only made me jump a mile in the air, not stop my heart beating.
See this Greg’s approach to this was to fly at 50mph at my window and slam into it.
But don’t worry bird enthusiasts little Greg lives. He didn’t even stop flying after he crashed into my window either.
He just turned around and flew quickly in the opposite direction,
Until another day Greg.
Until.
Another.
Day!
Well g2g
Until next time bird fans and foes
The Truthful One,
Out,
Peace.
Well this is what you get when you combine my insane friends, myself and the world. WORLD you have been WARNED XD
Friday, 3 June 2011
Wednesday, 1 June 2011
Pigeons Be Gone
Okay over the past few weeks there has been a pigeon (That I have named Taylor) that has nested in the tree outside of my bedroom window, which is fine, until it decides to find as many possible ways to annoy me!
Right well it started off when I was sitting here typing away at my English homework, when all of a sudden Taylor comes and lands on the flat roof outside my window and stared at me, which I ignored thinking he would fly away soon enough. Well I THOUGHT he would, instead after ten minutes I could still feel him glaring at me, which after ten minutes really bugged me. So I got up and started banging on the window, luckily he flew off pretty quickly.
He continued to do this for about a week, and then stopped coming which I thought was brilliant as I would stop looking like a fool banging on the window.
But it didn't last long.
Because a couple of nights ago I was sitting here doing my science homework (by the way I’m not obsessed with homework, I just get it out of the way so I can be insane a lot more) when I started hearing banging at my window, which when I looked up gave me quite a fright.
Taylor.
Was.
Banging.
At.
My.
Window.
But I think me falling off my chair scared him off.
And he hasn’t been back.
Yet.
Well g2g
Hehe
The Truthful One
XD
Right well it started off when I was sitting here typing away at my English homework, when all of a sudden Taylor comes and lands on the flat roof outside my window and stared at me, which I ignored thinking he would fly away soon enough. Well I THOUGHT he would, instead after ten minutes I could still feel him glaring at me, which after ten minutes really bugged me. So I got up and started banging on the window, luckily he flew off pretty quickly.
He continued to do this for about a week, and then stopped coming which I thought was brilliant as I would stop looking like a fool banging on the window.
But it didn't last long.
Because a couple of nights ago I was sitting here doing my science homework (by the way I’m not obsessed with homework, I just get it out of the way so I can be insane a lot more) when I started hearing banging at my window, which when I looked up gave me quite a fright.
Taylor.
Was.
Banging.
At.
My.
Window.
But I think me falling off my chair scared him off.
And he hasn’t been back.
Yet.
Well g2g
Hehe
The Truthful One
XD
Sunday, 29 May 2011
Soaked
Avast ye land lubbers, it is aye the truthful one back yet again with…*cough, cough*, maybe I should stop talking like this *splutter*.
Anyway, I’m back with some more random news.
Well, I guess you’re all wondering why on earth I’m talking like a pirate, (and no it’s not a new level of insanity) It is because today I went with my friend to see…what for it…
Pirates of the Caribbean: On stranger tides.
Yay
So as your all probably reading this thinking that it is all normal, well, you should know by now.
Nothing.
Is.
Ever.
NORMAL!
At least anything that appears on here.
So, as I was happily watching the film, seeing Johnny Depp attack someone with his sword, my friends next to me started passing something along the aisle towards me, along with some muttering, the object finally reached me.
It was my best friends phone.
Well it was obviously turned off, and as there were at least 6 people between us I didn’t want to interrupt the film with me returning a phone, so I put it in my pocket until the end of the film. Their was only one problem
I.
Forgot.
I.
Had.
The.
Phone!
As the credits came up and people started leaving the venue, my best friend started questioning us to see which one of us had the phone, but seeing as I forgot I had the phone, and only remembered I was the last one with it, I told him I had dropped it.
As you can probably expect he went loony (and I mean more loony than he already is) and started franticly looking under rows of chairs desperate to find his phone. A couple of minutes later I realised that I had put the phone in my pocket, and thought about telling him that I had it so I was about to tell him when he came over and,
Sat on me!
Yes your eyes have not deceived I did put down that he sat on me, and it wasn’t in the “oh I’m sorry, too dark to see quickly get up” sort of way. He just came over sat on me, flattening me against the chair, and said:
“If you don’t give me the phone I’ll just stay sitting here.”
Which is when I realised he was sitting on my hand that had his phone in.
Well I pointed this out to him but he didn’t believe me, so using my arm that was free I shaved him quite hard so that he would get off. It worked and he got his phone back, so everything was looking up for him. But for me this cinema trip has ended up with me:
Going to go watch a film
Me being given my friends phone and forgetting I had it
Being sat upon
And being covered in cola
Yes the last one is true. As I realised when my friend got off me that he had sat on my half full cola drink and it exploded all over my jacket.
So the moral of this story:
Don’t take your friends phone and forget you have it.
Well I’d better go wash/burn my jacket
The Truthful One
Over and out
XD
Anyway, I’m back with some more random news.
Well, I guess you’re all wondering why on earth I’m talking like a pirate, (and no it’s not a new level of insanity) It is because today I went with my friend to see…what for it…
Pirates of the Caribbean: On stranger tides.
Yay
So as your all probably reading this thinking that it is all normal, well, you should know by now.
Nothing.
Is.
Ever.
NORMAL!
At least anything that appears on here.
So, as I was happily watching the film, seeing Johnny Depp attack someone with his sword, my friends next to me started passing something along the aisle towards me, along with some muttering, the object finally reached me.
It was my best friends phone.
Well it was obviously turned off, and as there were at least 6 people between us I didn’t want to interrupt the film with me returning a phone, so I put it in my pocket until the end of the film. Their was only one problem
I.
Forgot.
I.
Had.
The.
Phone!
As the credits came up and people started leaving the venue, my best friend started questioning us to see which one of us had the phone, but seeing as I forgot I had the phone, and only remembered I was the last one with it, I told him I had dropped it.
As you can probably expect he went loony (and I mean more loony than he already is) and started franticly looking under rows of chairs desperate to find his phone. A couple of minutes later I realised that I had put the phone in my pocket, and thought about telling him that I had it so I was about to tell him when he came over and,
Sat on me!
Yes your eyes have not deceived I did put down that he sat on me, and it wasn’t in the “oh I’m sorry, too dark to see quickly get up” sort of way. He just came over sat on me, flattening me against the chair, and said:
“If you don’t give me the phone I’ll just stay sitting here.”
Which is when I realised he was sitting on my hand that had his phone in.
Well I pointed this out to him but he didn’t believe me, so using my arm that was free I shaved him quite hard so that he would get off. It worked and he got his phone back, so everything was looking up for him. But for me this cinema trip has ended up with me:
Going to go watch a film
Me being given my friends phone and forgetting I had it
Being sat upon
And being covered in cola
Yes the last one is true. As I realised when my friend got off me that he had sat on my half full cola drink and it exploded all over my jacket.
So the moral of this story:
Don’t take your friends phone and forget you have it.
Well I’d better go wash/burn my jacket
The Truthful One
Over and out
XD
Thursday, 26 May 2011
Random Fact.
Okay every so often i will put up a random fact so that you, people of earth and beyond can show of to your chums.
Todays random fact:
Ten human body parts are 3 letters long: Arm, Leg, Rib, Eye, Hip Jaw Toe, Ear, Lip, Gum
So have a think about that for a while until I inspire you all with another random fact.
Until next time.
The Truthful One
XD
Todays random fact:
Ten human body parts are 3 letters long: Arm, Leg, Rib, Eye, Hip Jaw Toe, Ear, Lip, Gum
So have a think about that for a while until I inspire you all with another random fact.
Until next time.
The Truthful One
XD
Bugs. Need To. DIE.
That's it
Bugs. Need.To.Die!!!
Don't get me wrong I’m at one with the earth, all for stopping global warming, global dimming, saving the rain forest, etc.
and to all you bug lovers out there, I’m sorry but they are EVIL and they need to DIE.
I mean okay they help pollinate and with out them we would probably die but why would a bug need to go into my SCHOOL BAG.
!!!!
For one thing there are no flowers in my bag therefore no pollen
And second my friends are freaked out by bugs WAY more so it would have made sense to bug them instead (Hehehe, Sorry for the cheesy bug pun it was just to tempting XD)
So anyway there I am reaching to get my pen out of my bag when all of a sudden this fly comes out and lands on my desk, and I could have sworn it was staring at me.
So I did the obvious thing (well in my mind it was obvious thing) and stared back.
MWAHAHAHA
BUG STARING CONTEST!!
Must not blink
Twitch, twitch
...
NOOOOOOOOO!
I BLINKED
Poo.
Anyway after having a staring contest with the bug I could tell it was about to fly away, when my friend, who was sitting next to me realized there was a bug on the desk and FREAKED OUT. Like, massive, over the top, insane freak out.
...
The next thing I know he is franticly hitting the bug yelling
"DIE, DIE, DIE"
Now anyone who was on looking this, I would just like to say "I apologize on his behalf, he was not aiming it towards you, it was the bug."
Anyway he has, in the kindest way possible, got lousy aim, and yet managed to hit the bug.
!
Just as I was about to start feeling sorry for the bug, the strangest thing happened,
The bug came back to life!!
Hallelujah.
And from the look on my friends face he was extremely shocked (probably from the fact he actually managed to hit the bug).
But even with this in mind
Bugs,
Need,
To,
Die.
G2G
The Truthful One
Over and out
XD
Bugs. Need.To.Die!!!
Don't get me wrong I’m at one with the earth, all for stopping global warming, global dimming, saving the rain forest, etc.
and to all you bug lovers out there, I’m sorry but they are EVIL and they need to DIE.
I mean okay they help pollinate and with out them we would probably die but why would a bug need to go into my SCHOOL BAG.
!!!!
For one thing there are no flowers in my bag therefore no pollen
And second my friends are freaked out by bugs WAY more so it would have made sense to bug them instead (Hehehe, Sorry for the cheesy bug pun it was just to tempting XD)
So anyway there I am reaching to get my pen out of my bag when all of a sudden this fly comes out and lands on my desk, and I could have sworn it was staring at me.
So I did the obvious thing (well in my mind it was obvious thing) and stared back.
MWAHAHAHA
BUG STARING CONTEST!!
Must not blink
Twitch, twitch
...
NOOOOOOOOO!
I BLINKED
Poo.
Anyway after having a staring contest with the bug I could tell it was about to fly away, when my friend, who was sitting next to me realized there was a bug on the desk and FREAKED OUT. Like, massive, over the top, insane freak out.
...
The next thing I know he is franticly hitting the bug yelling
"DIE, DIE, DIE"
Now anyone who was on looking this, I would just like to say "I apologize on his behalf, he was not aiming it towards you, it was the bug."
Anyway he has, in the kindest way possible, got lousy aim, and yet managed to hit the bug.
!
Just as I was about to start feeling sorry for the bug, the strangest thing happened,
The bug came back to life!!
Hallelujah.
And from the look on my friends face he was extremely shocked (probably from the fact he actually managed to hit the bug).
But even with this in mind
Bugs,
Need,
To,
Die.
G2G
The Truthful One
Over and out
XD
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